"Preach the Word" -Paul

The search for one's call in life is a great adventure that encompasses a vast spectrum of emotions, situations, thoughts, and feelings.  For me that search has been just that.  I have been excited.  I have been scared.  I have been in situations that seem to confirm that calling and some that make me question it.  Thoughts daily pervade my mind about that which I believe I have been called.  And then I have feelings of certainty while uncertainty has its moments all too often.  There have been many prayers and conversations about what God has called me to, vocationally speaking.  There are certain things all Christians are called to but He calls certain people out to do His ministry full time.  I believe I am one of those whom God has called out to do His work in full time ministry.

I have heard many stories of guys who had this one time in their life where God spoke to them and that was it.  For me it has been quite different.  God has slowly changed my heart and guided my thoughts towards what He is calling me to.  Many times when I have prayed about what God is calling me to do I have heard three specific words written to a young pastor.  This young pastor goes by the name of Timothy and his spiritual mentor and leader was a guy we know as Paul.  In Paul's second letter to the young pastor he writes these words in chapter four: "preach the word."  Paul's command is so simple yet so weighty.  I keep coming back to those words.  "Preach the word."

I have Oswald Chambers' devotional book My Utmost for His Highest.  The other morning before work I picked it up and read the days message, which I recently discovered was last months message for the same day but God knows what He is doing.  The title of June 28th is "Apprehended by God."  On this day's devotional Chambers is talking about being called out by God.  He mentions the very thing I have already talked about.  He says, "Every Christian must testify, but when it comes to the call to preach, there must be an agonizing grip of God's hand on you, your life is in the grip of God for that one thing."  I think God is tightening His grip.  I have been asked multiple times lately about what I plan to do after seminary and my response has been, "I don't really know yet."  I don't believe it's vital that I know exactly what that is right now but I would like to begin to have an idea soon.  My call to the ministry is no longer the question.  The question is now, "What does God want me to do in the ministry?" 

I find myself thinking about the church quite frequently.  I think about what needs to be changed most often.  Any honest and discerning Christian can tell you that the Church needs a makeover, bad.  As I have asked that question myself there have been a few reoccurring thoughts or ideas on what I might end up doing.  But the one I find my thoughts occupied by the most is starting a church.  I see much in the church that needs to be changed, instituted, and just taken out altogether such as:

1. Worship: the American Church's view of worship for the most part, has been so skewed and warped.  We think worship is music.  We are told that worship is a lifestyle but I see little to no evidence of people living that out.  What does it really look like?  
2. Church Discipline: I have never seen a Church that exercises true discipline.
3. Evangelism: we need to throw out our idea that evangelism is inviting people to church and realize that we as the body of Christ are the Church and the people around us should see the glory of God in us.  I stole that from David Platt.

These are just a few of the things that have occupied my thoughts at one time or another.  I know there are churches out there that do all of these things listed above effectively but they are a rare breed.  The church today is so far from the church of Acts.  I will not be one to say that we cannot go back the way the church was in Acts and the first century.  But if God is in fact calling me out to start a church I want to do my best in figuring out what all of these facets of the church should look like.  I won't fix all the problems of the church but the church has great room to improve and I want to help it.  As I look at the bride of Christ, I see a tired and weary one.  I want to do my best by the grace of God to help her look her best when her King returns to take her home.